New Year Productivity Looks Different For Everyone
My spoonie friends (and anyone else who may resonate with this message),
It's the start of a new year and we all know what that means: a tidal wave of posts, articles, ads, and images about being the most productive you possible, setting goals and resolutions, supercharging your motivation, jumping straight back into jam-packed daily routines, and messaging about how being the best version of you means waking up at 6AM, hitting the gym, meal-prepping for the week, and starting your work day two hours before everyone else in order to give you that edge.
January is yet another month where the overall message is GO GO GO!
But what happens when your body just won't let you rev up like that? When you're debilitated by a chronic disease that keeps you moving slower than slow? When incessant symptoms make working a regular job impossible? When illness makes day-to-day life so unpredictable that you've learned not to make plans and goals because they inevitably go sideways and you're left with that familiar feeling of crushing disappointment?
I'm about to enter my seventh year (so crazy) of being a full-time, stay-at-home chronic illness patient following what I call my Big (Health) Crash at the start of 2014 and I still feel some of that pressure to hustle and subscribe to this mass productivity mindset.
But today, I want to remind you just as much as I want to remind myself that productivity can (and will) look different for different people.
Following the holiday season, which is extremely taxing on the systems of spoonies and often results in a flare-up in symptoms, exacerbated pain, and the triggering of crashes and post-exertional malaise, the end of the holiday season and consequently the start of the new year is going to look vastly different. That is okay, my friends. It is okay for your new year to look different, for your definition of productivity to look different.
It's going to look like finally slowing down. Sleeping in. Resting lots. Deep breathing to calm the over-stimulated nervous system. Investing in self-care (whatever that means for you). Going into aggressive rest therapy. Directing focus towards pain and other symptom management. Just doing what is necessary to pour back into your well-being.
Why is this okay? Because anything that sets us back health-wise is actually counterproductive. But doing things that support our healing process (including doing nothing but resting) is we how can redefine productivity so that it makes sense for us.
This morning, I felt that pressure to get out of bed and get down to business but instead, I stayed in bed. I tuned in to my body. I felt the fatigue and sensed the pain and knew that the right thing to do for my well-being was to give myself that permission to rest. To go slow. To return to practices that support my healing like morning meditation, breathing, and writing.
Instead of setting goals like "I'm going to work out five times a week", I reflected on how I'd like to feel this year and what I can do to support that. Instead of adhering to goals with deadlines, I thought of intentions for myself that could help me live this life of chronic illness with some sense of peace, gratitude, and contentment while I continue to try to heal myself.
I'm not saying you should give up, stop trying, and do nothing for the rest of your life, because I'm sure as hell not. But I am saying that now is the time to listen to the whispers of your body and let that be your guiding light rather than the external noise of this world.
With love & light,
Your fellow spoonie, Christina
